day twenty...perfection

It's about to get real up in this blog post. But first, happy 27th birthday to my beloved brother, Jesse! He is the best brother a sister could ever have. :)

Perfection is something I have struggled with my entire life. Now, you may be wondering, what kind of perfection? beauty, body, grades? I have struggled with all of those things, but there is one type of perfection that has always haunted me and has on numerous occasions led me to failure. It is the perfection of the diet...or in this case, health plan.

For example, in the past few years, if I were to eat just one chip or cookie or basically anything that wasn't on my approved foods for the diet I was currently on, I would throw in the towel and call it quits and go on a binging spree, eating every food that was available to me. I would think, well, I have already eaten a cookie...why not finish the box! Now you can see how I got to be at the weight I am now. Because, I am far from perfect...like really far. And I would give into that one cookie all the time, so I never stuck to a diet.

Are you one of those people who will only start a diet on a Monday? Well, I was. So if I blew my diet on Tuesday, I would tell myself, well, eat while you can because I am starting again on Monday...that's five days later! So for five days, I was eating a bunch of junk food "promising" myself I would get back on the wagon on Monday. If you don't know, I started the Medifast Plan on a Friday—the day after I received my first package of food. I wasn't going to wait until the weekend was over! I was sick of feeling "blah" all the time and wanted to change as soon as I could.

So this brings me to today. Why did I bring this up now if I am not struggling with perfection? Well, truth is, I still am. Sure, I haven't strayed from the plan or eaten anything I shouldn't have, but I still get down on myself for the things I do eat and when. I ate too late, or my lean and green meal could have been more simple and better for me. Things like that. Yesterday, I felt a little bloated, so I immediately blamed it on my lean and green meal. I shouldn't have had the marinara sauce. I should have just stuck to a salad. I didn't even give my body a time to digest before I started judging myself!

But, I am still learning. My body will change over time and I cannot judge it by how I feel. I used to weigh myself everyday as well, and if the number stayed the same or went up, I would go and eat something full of fat and sugar because I felt sorry for myself...and a lot of good that did. I am glad I don't weigh myself everyday now. My body is changing day to day and I shouldn't be focused on a number.

Wow...that was a lot! But I just want to encourage you that if you struggle with being perfect in your diet or health plan, you are not alone! God is helping me get through it, and He will help you too.

Breakfast
I had a staff meeting at 8am this morning, so I decided to forgo the shake and opt for a quicker-to-eat option. So, I made a blueberry soft bake and ate it on my way to the meeting. The picture looks terrible, I know, but it didn't taste as bad as it looks ;)

Morning Snack
I had the cappuccino again...it is just so good! I am happy I ordered more! I also ordered the chai latte drink mix...I hope it is as good as it sounds!

Lunch
I went to Trader Joe's last night to buy some more meatless meatballs, and they are out! I am so sad! Those are the best. So, I looked around and decided to get more pizza burgers and try out these California meatless burgers. And in case you are wondering, no, I am not vegan or vegetarian, I just really like the taste of meatless products. And they also tend to be lower in calories. So for lunch I used one of the California burgers and chopped it up and put it on top of a romaine salad with Italian dressing.

Afternoon Snack
At lunch we got my brother a chocolate cake for his birthday, and sure, the cake looked pretty good, but I wasn't thinking, I have to have that! I simply said no, and moved on. It was a pretty awesome moment for me. So, instead of having a piece of cake, I popped open a bag of brown sugar crunch cereal (which smells like french toast) and was totally satisfied.

Dinner
I ate dinner a bit late tonight because I knew I would be home late from church. So I ate a quick peanut butter crunch bar and headed off to church!

Dessert
I have to admit something to you...I went off plan tonight. Before you freak out, let me explain. It was communion tonight so I had a tiny piece of a cracker and a sip of grape juice. I was debating whether or not to take it, but then I realized that there should be no question about it. I believe the Lord will honor me in doing so. This is the only exception to "breaking" the Medifast Plan, and it's only once a month. I will live. So when I got home from church I was going to make a peanut butter milkshake, but I accidentally grabbed the dark chocolate shake packet, so that is what I had. Still tasted yummy!

Well, that is all I have for today! Don't strive for perfection...strive towards Jesus and all will be okay.

xoxo,
Toni

day sixteen...running the race

taken after the race

 Today I ran a race...both physically and spiritually. Let's start with the physical race.

Well, I woke up this morning, got ready, and headed out with my parents to run a 5k color run. Now, before I began Medifast, I would run about 3-4 miles three times a week with no problem. Yes, I would get tired, but I would always push through it. Today however was a different situation...totally different. My health coach told me to take it easy with my running for the first two weeks of the program—which I did.

I am in week three now, so I thought I could just breeze through the run like I have in the past. But I was wrong...like way wrong. I pretty much struggled the entire time. The first mile went pretty good, not too much pain, but soon after I was hurting. I definitely had to listen to my body—it was screaming for me to stop and walk. It was humbling, but I did. My mom was also with me the entire time and did not leave me in the (color) dust...she's a keeper. ;) After walking for a few minutes, we would pick the pace up again and begin running...only for me to call a break and start walking once again. We did this for the rest of the run, but it worked. We ran the majority of the run, so that is an accomplishment. But I can honestly say that I did the best I could.

taken before the race

Moral of the story...listen to your body and know that you will not be able to do all you could do before the Medifast program. I am going to begin a workout plan beginning Monday, but it will mainly consist of toning exercises. I will probably add some cardio as well, but just try to shoot for 1 mile of running rather than 3. Some things will have to be adjusted because I am not feeding my body all the calories and energy I used to. My body is still adjusting to the low calorie diet. I'm just taking it little by little.

Okay, so here is the spiritual side of the story...after the run and me realizing just how weak I was, the Lord gave me a verse that spoke wonders to me. Now, I have heard this verse more times than I can count, but in this particular moment, it was just what I needed to hear. Taken from Hebrews 12:1, it says,

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us." 

How great is that! I may not have broken any records running today, but I did endure and finish the race! Even with my new health program. It is helping me lay aside the sin of overeating and turning my focus to the Lord rather than my flesh. Keep running your race. You may have just begun (like me), but the finish line is there, we just need to keep enduring and we will eventually see it.

my mom and me right after we crossed the finish line

Anyways, I hope that this encourages some of you today who may be struggling with endurance. Keep going! It may hurt physically, but you will win greatly spiritually.


Breakfast
I had to make a quick breakfast to eat on the go to the race. So I made a pancake muffin in a mug. I then cut it in half and stuck it in a toaster. Delish!

Morning Snack
I had my morning snack a little after I finished the race. I wasn't too hungry after that difficult run, but I ate it anyways. I chose something small and easy to eat (because I was in the car). Also, I came prepared and pack multiple snacks. You just never know what will happen and you don't want to be without your meals! And yes, those are my running pants...covered in color!

Lunch
Lunch was a little late for me today, so I ate a simple meatball salad. It is quick and easy to make and tastes delicious too!

Afternoon Snack
At this point, I was just relaxing, so it was nice to eat a crunchy snack while doing my nails. It was easy to eat too so I didn't mess up my freshly painted fingers.

Dinner
After my fingers dried, I decided to try out a little recipe. I took the brown sugar oatmeal and made granola out of it. But I will get to that next. For dinner I made a dark chocolate shake. I was going to a friend's house and this was a perfect meal to make and take with me to drink on the drive over.

Dessert
I made granola, and it wasn't half bad. I baked it in advance because I had to take it with me to eat at my friend's house—didn't want to be unprepared and tempted. While they were eating pizza, dr. pepper, and brownies, I munched on my oatmeal granola. And you know what? I didn't feel left out! No one even mentioned or asked why I wasn't eating pizza too. They all understood! Love my friends! Just make sure that you have supportive friends who won't drag you down.

So that's it! Quite a busy day, but it was a good one. I hope your Sunday is a fun one!

xoxo,
Toni

day fifteen...week two weigh in

Today was pretty slow and uneventful. I started out the day by weighing myself right after I woke up... and guess what?! I lost another 4.2 pounds! So crazy to think I am losing weight by eating pancakes and chocolate. So this brings my total weight lost to 11.6 pounds. It has only been two weeks and I have already lost 11 and 1/2 pounds! This program is beyond great...you convinced yet? Well, hopefully I will have you convinced in a few more weeks after I have lost even more weight.

I have also decided to do monthly photos and measurement check in's rather than weekly or biweekly. So in two more weeks I will be updating you all on how I look...unless you see me at church or work or something...then you already know. ;)

Breakfast
I started off the morning with a nice hot cup of Medifast calorie burn cappuccino. I used a milk frother to mix the powder and water, and it turned out creamy and smooth—no chunks. Yay!

Morning Snack

So...I tried something new again with the oatmeal. Instead of cookies, I made a muffin. It was so easy too. I simply added 1/4 cup of water and mixed it in a mug. I then microwaved it for 1 minute and 30 seconds. After that I took the muffin out of the mug and flipped it and microwaved it yet again for another 30 seconds to dry it out a bit. It was so good! I am excited to see what else I can do. :)

Lunch
Lunch was amazing. All I did was toss some fresh green beans with a little bit of olive oil and seasonings and bake them for about 25 minutes. And on the side I had some meatballs. Such a perfect and balanced meal...not to mention delicious.

Medifast Lean and Green Breakdown:
lean: 6 meatballs
green: 1 1/2 cups of green beans
healthy fat: 1 teaspoon of olive oil

Afternoon Snack
Lunch kept me fairly full, but I was pretty excited for my afternoon snack. I had some brown sugar cereal. This is one of my favorites. Even before I went on the Medifast program I loved to eat cereal (most of the time I would binge on it), so this snack is perfect for me.

Dinner
It's weird to call a snack "dinner", but oh well...it is what it is. So for dinner I had a peanut butter crunch bar. Another one of my favorites. It actually tastes like an old protein bar I used to eat back in the binging days...but this one is way better for me...and honestly tastes better too.

Dessert
To end the day, I had a chocolate chip cookie soft bake. Now that I look back on my day, it was full of sweet foods...hmmmm...oh well. Tomorrow is a new day full of different foods. I microwaved the soft bake in a larger bowl just for fun...made a bigger, yet flatter cookie, which I liked. I know the picture makes it look kinda gross, but I promise you it was delicious!

Well, that is it for today. Just remember to hold fast to the Word of God and don't lose hope when things look grim...God is always in control!

xoxo,
Toni

day eleven...the Father's warmth

the view from the middle of my street this morning

Have you ever had one of those mornings when you wake up and just want to stay in bed all day long? That was me this morning. My alarm went off and I immediately felt the chill overcome my body as I began to get out of my bed. I stood for a moment and hopped right back under my covers just so I could feel the warmth once more. I did not want to leave—I knew that as soon as I did, I would be cold and uncomfortable.

This is the way I should be with the Lord. He keeps me warm and happy as He wraps His arms around me. I never want to leave His presence, and I know that as soon as I do, my life will become stale, cold, and uncomfortable. Now, I can prolong this misery, or I can jump right back into His open arms as He begins to warm me up once again. God will always be there for me—whether I am walking with Him or if I have strayed. He is there. Arms open wide, just waiting for me to return.

Just think about that as you go about your day today. Stay in the Father's warmth.

Now, I totally spaced this morning and didn't get a picture of my breakfast or morning snack, but I became more diligent as the day went on. :)
But for the record, I had a mocha shake for breakfast and a peanut butter crunch bar for my morning snack. Both delicious!

Lunch: Meatless Meatball Salad

These meatless meatballs from Trader Joe's are amazing. You simply bake them for ten minutes and they come out crisp on the outside and soft on the inside. It paired very well with some romaine lettuce and Italian dressing.

Medifast Lean and Green Breakdown:
Lean: meatless meatballs
Green: romaine lettuce
Healthy Fat: Italian dressing

Afternoon Snack: BBQ Bites

These are still not my favorite, but I am eating them anyways because I did buy them—and no food will go to waste on this program. So I sucked it up and ate them. But hey, it kept me satisfied for the next couple hours.

As I got home from work, the chill began to creep through my thick sweater. And what better way to warm up after a rainy day than to eat hot and steamy comfort food. So I pulled out the perfect Medifast meal...mac and cheese.

Dinner: Macaroni and Cheese

Mac and cheese isn't that pretty to photograph, but I tried and will get better over time. But anyways, it tasted way better than it looked and it hit the spot. Dinner perfected.

And of course, I go in the complete opposite direction for dessert and make myself an icy cold peanut butter milkshake. I have to admit, these milkshakes are becoming one of my absolute favorite things to eat. It tricks my mind into thinking I am drinking a calorie filled milkshake, when in reality, it is just my Medifast soft serve blended with some water and ice. Love it!

Dessert: Peanut Butter Milkshake

Well, that is it for today! I am off to bed and ready to see what awaits me tomorrow.

xoxo,
Toni

Pizza Boats

I finally have a recipe for you all!

I tried this last night, and it was divine. Definitely a "comfort food" kind of meal. I really don't even like zucchini but I loved this, and I promise you will too.

Step One: Gather your ingredients. You will need mini zucchini, pizza flavored meatless burger, light mozzarella cheese, and marinara sauce. All these ingredients can be bought at Trader Joes—that is where I do most of my shopping. If you can't find the pizza burger, you can use any meatless burger or ground turkey.

Ingredients:
1 Trader Joe's Pizza Meatless Burger
1/4 cup of marinara sauce
1 ounce of light mozzarella cheese
about 12-15 mini zucchini
1 teaspoon of olive oil (not pictured)

Step Two: Pour about a teaspoon of olive oil into the bag and steam the mini zucchini in the mircrowave or on the stove.

Step Three: Cut the ends off of the zucchini and then take a sliver off of one side. Just cut the skin mainly.

Step Four: While letting the zucchini cool down, go ahead and crumble up the burger. It really just falls apart.

Step Six: Add the marinara sauce and mix it up.

Step Seven: Scoop out a bit of the zucchini flesh. You can add the it to the meat if you like or just save it for something else.

Step Eight: Pour the burger mix into each zucchini "boat" and then sprinkle the cheese onto them.

Step Nine: Cook it in the microwave for about 1 minute and 30 seconds—basically until the cheese melts. Just keep an eye on it. And then enjoy!

That's it! It is a fairly easy recipe and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Medifast Lean and Green Breakdown:
Lean: Trader Joe's Meatless Pizza Burger, 1/4 cup of light mozzarella cheese
Green: 2 cups of mini green zucchini, 1/4 cup of Trader Joe's marinara sauce
Healthy Fat: 1 teaspoon of extra virgin olive oil

xoxo,
Toni